Part of my work in the world is to help you transform your relationship to eroticism, pleasure and sexuality. The Erotic Blueprints are the framework, a language, if you will, that allow us to bring joy, levity, healing and play.
Read MoreWhether you have welcome this change, or are kicking and screaming, we need “medicine” that will help us navigate this transition. Biodynamic craniosacral therapy is especially helpful for the traumatic and intense cultural milieu we find ourselves in in the present day.
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But how often do you celebrate how your sweetie is different from you? It's easy when the relationship is new, and you're both in the rush of New Relationship Energy. They are so refreshing! That weird habit of theirs is wild and it shakes up your world! But over time, those differences can shift from celebration to irritation.
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I had a lot of fun chatting with Dave Glaser of the Believe, Be Bold, Be Real podcast about the Erotic Blueprints, the myth of sexual incompatibility, and my own journey with sexuality…..
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Exploring the Erotic Blueprints on The Ghosted Podcast!
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Jaiya busts a lot of big myths about sexuality on the Goop podcast!
Read MoreI was honored to be the guest on my dear friend Rabbi Jessica Marshall’s Sacred Stories video series! In this deeply powerful conversation, I share my story about finding my own voice and how that emerges in my relationships.
We explore the universal human question, "Can I trust to be loved as my true self?" Can I show up as I truly am and be deeply loved for that?……
The 5 Erotic Blueprint quick and dirty tour!
Energetic—Turn on: loves space, anticipation and tease. Shadows: can struggle with safety, and hierarchical thinking.
Sensual— Turn on: the realm of the five senses; textures, tastes, smells, lighting, etc. Shadows: can be too much in head and have a hard time being present in the moment.
Sexual— Turn on: nudity, penetration, orgasms. Shadows: can be too goal-focused and miss the journey.
Kinky—Turn on: whatever is taboo for you, anything from sensations and impact to creative power play. Shadows: can experience deep shame.
Shapeshifter— Turn on: All of the above and more! Creativity and variety. Shadows: can shift to meet their lovers needs and end up feeling unfulfilled in theirs.
Introduction to the Erotic Blueprints --what they are and why they matter! I share the profound transformation in my life thanks to coaching and study in the erotic blueprints. (Spoiler! I found my authentic sexual expression, I learned how to invite and allow more capacity for pleasure, I healed my own shame, and I have a more connected, more evolved and more passionate relationship! Yummmmmm!) Check out the Part 2 video for a more in depth description of each Erotic Blueprint type.
Read MoreOnce you know your erotic blueprint type, it’s like having a secret decoder ring to creating super fulfilling intimacy. Knowing my type opened up a new level of personal pleasure and sexual satisfaction I didn’t even know was possible.
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Who has time for pleasure? I have one hundred items my ever-expanding to-do list.
-Embodied pleasure practices can be short, fun, interesting and easy to fit into your life. Yes, even if you ARE over-scheduled. Most Americans spend 52 hours a month (on average), wasting time on TV, social media, etc. What if we took even one of those hours and….
Read More"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom."-Victor FranklThe pause is the critical moment where we get to put theory into practice. This is the moment when you recognize and choose your actions. When you exercise choice, you harness your own power.
Read MoreThere are a lot of women who want men to be more open, vulnerable, emotionally available. I think men want this too. And it’s no question that men can tend to disconnect, brood, and try to handle their emotions on their own in isolation.
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My energy feels low, toxic, thick and compressed. There's a feeling in me of just.....wrongness. I look in the mirror, I judge all of my flaws. I wish I was better. I vow to "do" better, or "be" better, or make different choices to make myself feel better about myself.
How often is this a part of your inner dialogue? Have you ever tracked it? I would say for me, depending on the day, where I am in my cycle, etc, it can hover around 65%.
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What is your definition of love?
Here's (one of) mine.
My version includes: championing another person's sovereignty. Letting another person have an experience of their choosing, in their quest for their own happiness and growth. That experience might not be an experience *I* choose. It might not even include me.
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Many couples are doing okay but feel like something is missing. Others may have a sense that they are great friends, but not great lovers. Some feel like they are only roommates, or that they have been disconnected for years, fueling resentment. The great news is, that wherever your relationship is now is not where it needs to stay.
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When you block yourself from feeling a wave of emotion, you block your physical body as a way to block the emotion. After years of this, your body stops moving. And chances are, you don't feel much of anything.
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The constant 'noise' in my head caused by anxiety prevented me from seriously pursuing creative passions like dance and music. It discouraged me from certain educational paths. It talked me out of many a social or recreational pursuit, and crippled my ability to leave the house on many an occasion. It has caused me chronic body discomfort, digestive issues, jaw tension and an inability to concentrate. It robbed me of joy, confounded my ability to make clear decisions, or to even hear the wisdom of my own intuition.
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When my ex-boyfriend and I broke up four years ago, I was devastated. I remained attached to him in unhealthy ways that negatively affected me, him and close mutual friends. I was broke, alone in my mourning, and felt abandoned. I remember crying so hard one night I vomited. This went on for months. Summer turned into autumn, and then into the inevitable darkness of winter. I spent that long winter in a basement apartment, isolated and lonely, with spotty internet service and my two cats. It was not pretty.
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Sounds silly, I know. But how many of us were ever taught the art of healthy relationships?
Most of us learn how to 'do' relationships from the ways in which our parents or primary caretakers engaged in their relationships. And....well.....let's just say that for me, Relationship School in my family left a lot to be desired. Because they weren't well educated in healthy relationships either!
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